Habit #8: F.U.N.

9 Habits for Effective Life Group Leadership
Habit #8: F.U.N.

“On the third day, a wedding took place at Cana in Galilee. Jesus’ mother was there, and Jesus and his disciples had also been invited to the wedding."
- John 3:1-2

"If you’re not having fun, you’re doing something wrong."
- Groucho Marx, Comedian and Actor

"I like to think I’m a pretty good friend. I love having a good time, and I enjoy being able to share those good times with others."

- Jacob Batalon, Actor

We are in the next set of habits of Effective Life Group Leaders.  During this set, we are focusing on the Life Group Leader.  The healthier you are, the healthier your group can be.  So let's dive into the eighth habit.

An Effective Life Group Leader knows how to have FUN!!!!

I know what you are thinking.  Really.  FUN!  I can be fun...  

But really, how many of us really stop and have fun?  

Let me ask you this question:  How many people would invite you to hang out?   
Better yet:  How many people invite you to the party because they know you will bring the fun? 

It never ceases to amaze me how many people thought this about Jesus.  Let's look at John's telling at the wedding of Cana.

John 3:1-3

On the third day, a wedding took place at Cana in Galilee. Jesus’ mother was there, and Jesus and his disciples had also been invited to the wedding. When the wine was gone, Jesus’ mother said to him, “They have no more wine.”

First, Jesus and his disciples were invited to the wedding.  According to John, this would be Jesus's first miracle.  So before he became famous for his teachings or for the miracles he did, he was invited to this wedding.  The couple invited Jesus because they simply wanted him there.  

Second, they wanted him there so badly, that they invited all the disciples.  The sentence is structured so that it looks like Jesus and the disciples were invited.  They expected Jesus to bring the fun... By this time, Jesus had chosen twelve disciples which means he probably brought more than just the twelve.  No wonder they ran out of wine.   

Third, the rest of Jesus's family was invited.  Well, at least his mom was invited.  She definitely wasn't famous yet.  Her identity as Mary, the mother of Jesus, was probably still local.  Joseph isn't mentioned and so people think he had passed away by this time.  

We could spend hours talking about the rest of the story.  Was the wine real?  Why did Jesus talk to Mary the way he did? Was it disrespect (Jesus was sinless so was it more of a statement like when he was 12 at the temple)?   

The burning question:  Was Jesus a good dancer?   Could he do the chicken dance? 

But I digress...

So what can we glean about being fun and having fun from this story:

Let's use fun as an acronym:

F - FELLOWSHIP

The old joke goes:
 

Fellowship is a bunch of fellows on the same ship.

An effective Life Group Leader knows the value of fellowship.  When people interact with each other on a regular basis they develop lasting bonds and become comfortable sharing the hard parts of their life.  

Fellowship can be as simple as gathering around coffee at the beginning of the group.  Fellowship can and should take the form of gathering outside the group.  Planning dinner or an event outside your normal group time can accelerate the relationships developed in groups.  

If you really want to accelerate relationships through fellowship, mission trips or serve days are your best bet.   Serving in a situation outside your Life Group meeting allows people to do life together.  Often doing life together proves the key to connections.  This concept can apply to serving on a team together on Sundays but often schedules prevent the group from serving together at the same time.  

U - UPBEAT

I really wanted to use the word, "Whimsical" but I needed a u-word.  Positive and happy people are generally regarded as fun people.  When was the last time anyone invited Eyore to a party?  

We should keep this rhyme in mind: 

Every party needs a pooper that's why we invited you...  Party Pooper!!!

No one wants to hang out with the party pooper.  This doesn't mean you can't be sad but if you are always sad something is wrong.  Whimy, upbeat, positive, happy...  These are traits of people who people enjoy.  

I recognize there is a group of people who struggle with these statements.  They are known as introverts.  I am one.  I enjoy being by myself and I don't need the parties to be happy.  I recognize every room is an escape room when it is filled with people.  Sabbath rest can prepare you for moments of FUN!  Don't let your introversion keep you from godly fellowship and interaction.  I know lots of introverts who can offer a smile and a firm handshake.  

N - NICE

In this case, I equate Nice with Kind.  Finally, kindness attracts people.  Scripture says, "God's kindness leads us to repentance (Rom. 2:4)."  God has been kind to us. He didn't have to send Jesus.  He didn't have to provide a way to connect with him.  He chose kindness and mercy, even to the point of Jesus's death on the cross.  Let's choose to be kind.  Galatians 5 says kindness should grow in us naturally as a result of the fruit of the Spirit growing in us.  If you aren't kind, you need to check your heart. 

When we make these three truths about fun real in our church, it makes it easy to see people through the lens of Sunday: Everybody's Welcome. Nobody's Perfect.  And with Jesus, Anything Is Possible.